Emotional Support

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  • May 21, 2015 at 9:40 PM #2384
    Profile photo of wmdoranwmdoran
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    Think what you want but what I’m suggesting is not crazy. Here’s a recent story where the ‘donor’ father is winning rights: http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/jurisprudence/2015/02/sperm_donor_parental_rights_new_jersey_lesbian_couple_is_losing_visitation.html.

    These children are so young; 1.5 and other still in womb. You’re making the effect of this on the children bigger than reality. Having their father present in their lives and fighting for them is priceless and will outweigh any minor stress caused by this at such a young age. If the ‘parents’ shed stress on the kids that is not his fault just poor parenting.

    @ellssjay I have struggled with depression in the past related to this stuff and overcame it. If alcohol is part of his life I would recommend he abstain. Alcohol blocks a person from processing feelings and will only hurt during confrontation. It is a common easy go-to for depressed people. I think finding support groups is a good idea. This is such a controversial and not talked about struggle it is hard to find others to support and encourage. Hopefully you can find some support on here. Browse the Groups page. Also maybe look into groups for single dads on Meetup.com in his area or find a local group counseling office and see what they have to offer. Maybe he can find support there as well. I think group support would be better than individual.

    May 21, 2015 at 11:57 PM #2385
    Profile photo of yfactoryfactor
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    That’s what I call crazy. Yes in some countries a donor may win the legal battle, in the USA they discriminate between clinic/non-clinic donations. If he wins the children will then have contact during a number of years. But one day they’ve grown up and will learn how the donor broke his promise to attack the parents. The article also mentions how parents can avoid this mess: by using an anonymous sperm donor via a clinic. Legal battles would push towards more anonymous donations, without any contact at all.

    This is in sharp contrast to making an effort to have contact, which in this case would be good, by communication with the parents.
    Anyway, while we disagree about many things, I do hope you do agree that it would be better if matters can be settled outside of court.

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